“If you’re going to get stalked, at least make him hot and immortal.”
It’s always nice to feel wanted, but Grace wasn’t exactly looking for a boyfriend. Plus, getting stalked by a super hot vampire who’s invisible to everyone else just makes you look — and feel — crazy.
Not that her mental health is a high priority for the immortal.
Nic says they’re destined to be together. She’s pretty sure he’s a magical figment of her imagination… but he’s not taking no for an answer. He wants her body, her blood, and to make her his forever.
But does he have the magic wand to make her scream ‘yes?’
NOTE: The base story of ‘One Crazy Bite’ appeared in the ‘Bite Me’ anthology in 2019 but it’s been intensely edited with a brand new beginning and epilogue! A dirty, hilarious, paranormal romance for the vampire lover in all of us.
GOODREADS LINK: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/54403817-one-crazy-bite
BOOKBUB LINK: https://www.bookbub.com/books/one-crazy-bite-by-cassandra-faye
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Slightly fueled by caffeine, and her own subtly buzzing panic about her mental health, she decided to google ‘psychotic break.’ A Forbes article popped up and she read, ‘In terms of what it means, a ‘psychotic break with reality’ means losing contact with reality, such as hearing, seeing, tasting, smelling, or feeling something that has no external correlate (i.e., hallucinations).’
“Shit,” she muttered, continuing to read, feeling worse and worse as the symptoms uncomfortably lined up with her day.
Is this what it’s like to be crazy?
She didn’t feel crazy. She felt perfectly normal outside of the… hallucination. It was just one hallucination though! No pink elephants or strange voices in her head. Just one hallucination… that had happened twice… in less than four hours.
Groaning, she took another sip of the coffee and then immediately choked on it as her own personal hallucination sat down in the seat across from her. Coughing, she shoved her chair back, covering her mouth as another wracking cough almost doubled her over while he just tilted his head at her.
“Are you all right?” he asked, and she held up her hand, waving away the barista who had started to step out from the counter. It took a minute or so, but, finally, she was able to take a breath that didn’t pull hazelnut-flavored caffeine into her lungs.
Glaring at the hallucination, she hissed, “Are you visible?”
He smiled. “No.”
Grumbling, she wanted to yell so many things at him — it — whatever, but she scrambled for her phone first and pretended to answer it, holding it to her ear. “Hey,” she said to her imaginary friend on the line.
“Hello,” her hallucination responded, looking extremely amused. Dick.
“Why are you here?” she asked softly, trying not to look like she was glaring at empty space in front of her.
“Because you did not go home.” He leaned back in the chair, crossing one ankle over the opposite knee. “I waited for you.”
“You could have continued waiting.” Forever, she added in her head, and he chuckled.
“Patience has never been a virtue of mine, and I think I’ve waited long enough for you.”
“What does that even mean?” she asked, her voice turning slightly high-pitched as she tried to control the feeling of panic rising inside her.
“Just another of the things I’d love to explain to you if you’d meet me at your home.”
“I’m not— you— this is insane! Why am I even arguing with a hallucination?” Leaning forward, she blocked him out by bracing her forehead on her hand. “Maybe I should go to a hospital.”
“That’s unnecessary. You’re perfectly healthy and the tired feeling will pass. Have you eaten yet today?” he asked, sounding almost concerned. As if he — it — actually was. Or maybe that was her own mind reminding her she’d skipped breakfast… and lunch.
“Perhaps you should get something to eat.” As the suggestion left his lips, her stomach growled. The fucking traitor. He just laughed. “I think you’ll feel better, be less grumpy, if you grab one of those pastries.”
“Don’t tell me what to do,” she snapped, and he gave her a look that said this-is-what-I-mean. She returned his snarky look with her own you-don’t-even-exist glare.
“I feel like we got off on the wrong foot. Let me feed you tonight, and then I can eat too, and we can both go to bed much happier.”
Dammit, why was his voice so sexy? Like a growly, buzzy, humming, low-thing that found its way between her thighs and made her want… other things.
Things that she didn’t actually want. Not. At. All.
No, it was probably just another symptom of the psychosis. This gorgeous man-hallucination hybrid was most likely just a result of her dry spell since she’d broken things off with Eric… which had been… hell, had it really been nine months? Okay, yeah, that was a while. It had to be the reason she was dreaming up Hottie McCreeper. The same reason she’d had a crazy dream about a porno statue from both her best fantasies and her worst nightmares. There was probably someone in her phone she could call to remedy this without an exorcism or a padded room.
“I’m leaving,” she said out loud, standing up from her chair to remind the pulsing feeling between her thighs that she was serious.
“Well,” her hallucination replied in that delicious voice as he stood. “Why don’t you go home, and I will come see you later this evening. I think a good dinner, and a talk, will make things much clearer for the both of us.”
Why was his smile so charming? It was irritating, but she had to give bonus points to her damaged brain for giving her a psychotic break with flair. It would be much worse to be hallucinating something scary.
“Grace?” hallucination-hottie prompted her, and she sighed, realizing she still had the cell phone plastered to the side of her head.
“Fine, sure, dinner. Whatever. Just go away,” she shooed him, and he laughed. Stupid, sexy laugh.
“One thing before I go.” He crooked his finger and walked past her. “Come with me.”
PRAISE FOR ONE CRAZY BITE
“A vampire cursed and trapped in a statue needs his plehara (fated mate) to set him free. But can Grace accept that everything she sees and feels is real and she isn’t suffering from a break from reality? Sexy and funny and very entertaining.” – Florida Book Addict
“Grace and Nicomachus are two made for each other, but one of them just doesn’t realize it. Yet. And the story revolves and evolves around that discovery. And it is sweet, and funny, and hot, and at the end you will find a weight lifted off you that you may not have realized was there. It’s fun. It’s a damn vampire rom-com! There, I said it.” – Shane Starrett
“Ohhhh, sweet holy moly! I love me some Cassandra Faye!! I couldn’t eat Nic and Grace’s story up fast enough!” – JL Reviews
“This complete modern-day story had me in giggles as Grace tries to comprehend what is going on in her life, and the devoted and persistent Nic tries to win her over. A perfect vampire love story.” – Zelda Car
“The inner musings of Grace as she processed things were hilarious. I laughed out loud at the ordering of a blueberry scone and the reasons why. I have been through that reasoning so I get the need to not be haunted because of a lonely pastry. Nicomachus. SWEET. Holy Hell. who knew a vampire could be so delicious?! Dirty as all hell and intense.” – Maria Howard Review
“This amazing story had me laughing and loving every word!” – Jennifer D.
Cassandra Faye lives in Texas where she’s done nothing but fantasize about other worlds her entire life. Constantly daydreaming about ancient powers, faerie realms, old gods, and how seriously dangerous unicorns would be if they existed, Cassandra writes the stories she’s always craved. Taking paranormal and fantasy worlds, mixing them in with modern day, and adding a dash of darkness.
So, if you enjoy those fairy tales that were a little more grimm, or if you ever wondered just how bad the villains could be as you held on for that happily-ever-after, then you might be just the person she’s writing for.
Cassandra also writes dark contemporary romance as Jennifer Bene. You can find her online throughout social media with username @jbeneauthor and on her website: www.jenniferbene.com
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